Open Season 2023

Carly Mitchell welcomes the audience live and at home to this special night, reminding everyone that tonight we have all three tournament finals, meaning the first champions of the new lineages will be crowned! But there's a lot of action before that, and it all starts with Heartsrevolution's Ultraviolence hitting and Laurel Anne Hardy stepping out. She's all smiles, dressed in a brilliant white tuxedo, which to be honest is unlikely to remain white for very long. She slaps hands and hugs fans as she pushes a bright pink shopping trolley full of glitter-sprayed weapons down to the ring. Once inside, Carly passes her the mic and Laurel announces it's time for her special invitational deathmatch! She notes that some people have been asking her why it's called an "invitational" when anyone on the roster can throw their hat in, and explains that the very first one was by invitation - featuring Miko Ayano, Suzume Mitsuyoshi, Jamie Steel, the late Zack Lifer, and GEW's very own Matt Kail - and the name since then just kinda stuck. Now let's see who's going to be joining her for this edition!

The first to enter are a pair we already knew about: Takeo Shima and Alex Chambers, both local residents as part of the Wildfire crew! Takeo looks nervous as all hell but Alex (who's practically dragging him by the ear) assures him it'll all be fine, and once they're in the ring, Laurel does too. Alex gets up in her face, his loss to her a few shows ago clearly not forgotten, but when she blows him a kiss he just steps back with a serious, determined expression. Next up are Coby and Asher, the BiteSize Bros! They're joking around as usual as they join their fellow Wildfire grads Alex and Takeo in the ring. Serenity, making a rare appearance without Ligaya Fontaine at her side, is the next to join the party, followed by Zanatos, who frowns and points at Laurel once he's in the ring, mouthing something angrily. Laurel just shrugs and welcomes him to the match. Zanatos seems positively chipper compared to our next entrant though, as Myles Taylor storms out looking ready to murder absolutely everyone! He kicks Laurel's cart over as he passes it, sending light tubes and sticks and spools of barbed wire spilling all over the ground. In the ring he seems ready to go right now, but the ref pushes him back to a corner.

And then, there's that business is about to pick up feel as Walk hits and Troy Gafgen steps onstage! Everyone in the ring visibly tenses up as the former GEW World Champion stalks his way down. He steps in and looks around the field, and Laurel grins to see him here as the commentators remind us they had some violent run-ins across FRONTIER and FRONTLINE almost a decade ago.

Finally, Kimmese's Itsabet plays and out struts Snow Queen VN, brandishing her côn staff! She shakes her ankle around to show off that her injury is all healed up! Everyone in the ring is shocked to see her throwing her hat into this - it's quite the return match, but she swaggers down to the ring with a big smile at the thought of competing here tonight, a stone's throw from her adopted hometown. Laurel asks if she's sure she wants to do this, and Snow insists yes. With ten in the ring, Laurel nods and asks the timekeeper to ring the bell!

1. Alex Chambers vs Asher Webb vs Coby Webb vs Laurel Anne Hardy vs Myles Taylor vs Serenity vs Snow Queen VN vs Takeo Shima vs Troy Gafgen vs Zanatos
Alex immediately turns and decks Takeo! Meanwhile Troy and Zanatos both have the same idea and go after Laurel; everyone else soon joins in and they stomp the crap out of her for a few seconds before ejecting the host over the top. Troy slides out and goes after her, whipping her into the guardrail. Zanatos seems about to hop out too until he's set upon by Myles, leaving Asher and Coby to pair off with the impromptu tandem of Snow and Serenity. All the while, Alex is goading Takeo, trying to get him to hit him as hard as he can! Takeo shoves Alex in frustration but doesn't actually strike him, prompting Chambers to roll his eyes and point to his own jaw emphatically. Takeo still hesitates, so Alex smashes him with a forearm and takes him down. Outside, Troy, Myles, Laurel and Zanatos are engaged in a big fourway brawl, which splits apart when Myles makes a point of targeting Troy, the GEW Hall of Famer, presumably to make a point! That leaves Zanatos to punish Laurel, which he seems to relish. It's not long before the more deathmatchy weapons get involved, with the first blows coming when Snow and Serenity send the Webb brothers to the outside... glance at each other and hit the ropes for a stereo suicide dive, only to be met with a pair of light tube shots!

Myles only stops targeting Troy when he gets launched through a guardrail with a powerbomb. Gafgen finds Hardy and Zanatos not far away, and teams up with the latter to help him take decisive control over the former; together, they beat the hell out of the Asylum member, but all things must pass, and once it seems like Laurel's no longer a threat they quickly turn on each other, brawling all around ringside. Myles comes to slightly before Laurel and he too starts going after her, as the other favourite alongside Troy. From somewhere he finds a box cutter and starts gouging at her forehead, and her white tux is quickly splattered with scarlet splashes as the blood on her face progresses from a thin trickle to a full coating. But Laurel manages to fight back by hoisting him off his feet and staggering into a Death Valley bomb against the ringpost! It's her turn to take the box cutter to him, and he's soon almost as crimson-masked as she is, blood pooling in his stubble. On the other side of the ring, Troy heaves Zanatos into a post just a moment after Laurel did Myles, and he charges with a shoulder block - but the Empire of Blood man ducks and Troy's arm collides with the steel. Zanatos grabs a light tube and swings it back behind his head... only to find it ripped from his hands! He turns around on instinct and barely gets his hands up before Coby blasts him with it! Meanwhile Asher throws a cookie sheet at Troy's face, and then the brothers count off a quick one. two. three! before snapping the two veterans off their feet with a couple of huracanranas.

While Snow and Serenity fight over Snow's staff, Alex and Takeo have found their way to the big pile of weapons and Chambers is giving Shima a personal introduction to each one and what it does. Poor Takeo gets spinebustered through a light tube, stomped onto a cinder block and heaved into the shopping cart. Throughout all of it, Alex is begging Takeo to fight back, demanding he hurt him in return, and offering free shots. But all these weapons are something of a shock for Takeo, maybe literally since he's looking pale, and his return strikes are weak. Eventually, someone new comes near to where they are... Laurel Anne Hardy. Remembering his unfinished business with her, Alex finally switches targets and attacks Laurel with a two-by-four, leaving Takeo in blessed peace... at least until Myles starts going after him with a length of barbed wire. Somewhere along the way, the canvas fills up with tacks, Lego bricks, pine cones and mains adapters, leaving a carpet of pain for everyone who gets thrown into it (which, at some point in the match, is everyone). Light tubes get broken over various heads, cinder blocks get broken over various backs, pins get embedded into various patches of flesh, and Laurel's trademark thumbtack pies (where did they come from!?) get smushed into various faces, including Hardy herself getting a pie sandwich from Asher and Coby. While she's blinded they roll her into a double pin, but she manages to kick out and take them both down with Party Hardy variations before finally wiping her face. Alex and Myles have found each other by now and they're taking turns to dig light tube ends into each other, leaving puddles of blood beneath them.

Shortly after she ejects the BiteSize Bros from the ring, Zanatos blindsides Laurel and yeets her through all the debris with a German, but as he's pinning, Troy comes in with a cinder block and drives it into his head! Zanatos might easily have a concussion after that, but he gets up in Troy's face and shoves him, and the two biggest men in the match start slugging each other with heavy closed fists. There's no winner determined between them because Serenity sails down from the corner in a moonsault with a barbed wire wrapped chair in her hands, knocking down both of them! With the favourites all down or occupied, Asher slides in looking to steal a pin, only to be hit with a Negative Polarity Impulse from Snow Queen - but as she pins she gets a light tube upside the face from Coby! The brothers crush her into the shite all over the canvas with a powerbomb/flying lariat combo, and she drops to ringside... leaving the BiteSize Bros to turn and face each other! The fans cheer the young men on as they bump fists and then start grappling, throwing each other in turn through all the tacks and glass and other waste. Having come up through the backyards together, they know each other well, and they're impressing here - that is until Myles enters the ring and takes them both down with a double clotheline! He chucks Asher over the ropes, who goes flying and collides with the barricade, then drops Coby with a Reckless Rhetoric. One... two... three- Serenity dives across to break it up! This makes the Southern Born Killer see red, and he starts whipping her with a piece of barbed wire.

A massive cheer erupts as Snow comes to Serenity's rescue, smashing Myles over and over with her côn staff! They fight out of the ring, where Takeo connects a flying knee into Myles's face! The two Wildfire fighters work together to put him down. Meanwhile, Alex, Laurel and Zanatos are all trading shots in the ring now. Each of trio gets a moment where they seem to have the upper hand, but before any of them can find anything definitive, Troy's there, and he's found a table! He smashes all three to the ground at once with a monster charge, then starts to set up the table... and looks from one to the other, trying to figure out who to send through it. Before he can make a decision, Asher's back in and he hits a satellite on Troy. Troy blocks it, but Asher fights back with elbows, and they wind up tumbling over the ropes. When Alex comes around he sees the table set up, shrugs, and starts rolling Laurel onto it, though she wakes up halfway through and punches him in the face. He slugs her in the head, but before he can do any more, he's suddenly spun around and yanked into a cradle piledriver by Zanatos! His head gets driven right into a pile of cinder block fragments and pine cones. From her perch on the table, Laurel smashes Zanatos with a Punctum to drop him to all fours, then flies across him with the Anus Horribilis to drive his face, too, into the deathmatch debris! He still pushes himself up, but Laurel's already wrapping a length of barbed wire around her sleeve, and before he can get up fully she connects with a spiky sliding lariat. Alex gets one too - but then Laurel's caught with a superkick and a Painkiller from Serenity! Little Miss Phreakish quickly rolls Laurel onto the table, then climbs the ropes...

...Laurel staggers off and climbs after her! The two women trade shots, and even though she's just been rocked, Laurel still comes out ahead. She drags Serenity up in a fireman's carry, but the White Widow fights back with elbows and slaps and even a bite. Laurel hunkers to one knee, but doesn't loosen her grip... she slugs Serenity in the forehead with a barbed wire wrapped fist, causing fresh claret to drip off the zombie's face onto Laurel's (by now ripped and heavily bloodstained) suit. Working as quickly as she can, the maker of this match wraps the length of barbed wire around both herself and Serenity, lashing her opponent to her own body! All that before she takes a flying leap, driving Serenity through the table and into the detritus beneath! Hardy lands atop her - and the three count is made!
Winner via pinfall: Laurel Anne Hardy

After the match Laurel limps to her feet and tries to thank the fans and her fellow participants alike for helpping her create some art tonight, but not many of the fighters are both awake enough and magnanimous enough to respond.

Cassie Crowe emerges with a mic while the ring is cleaned up, reminding everyone that she previously issued an open challenge for tonight's show, with her opponent getting to pick the match type. She asks who's brave or stupid enough to take her up... no response is forthcoming right away, and Cassie smirks cockily... until the arena darkens and the screen flares up. Static bands chase across it until they settle into a familiar pair of words:


It scrambles for a moment, before becoming:


And then finally:


The lights come up to reveal a woman already standing on the stage. She's wearing what was probably once a Victorian style dress, but it's been cut up and converted into a boiler suit. Over it is a leather apron, stained with oil and dangling with all kinds of tools. And on her back - a bizarre ornate harness holding a tank filled with weird glowing blue liquid, which runs in pipes around her body. She introduces herself as Augusta D'Antagoné, and informs Cassie that she'll be the perfect test subject for her newest creation, a masterwork of engineering without parallel...

...RADBOT!

Daft Punk's Robot Rock hits and out strides a silver automaton. He walks to the ring in the classic Robocop gait, but with surprising speed. Cassie watches this with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension; as RADBOT steps into the ring she leaps at him, but he easily bats her aside with one arm!

2. Cassie Crowe vs RADBOT
RADBOT knocks Cassie down with clotheslines and powerslams over and over, as she doesn't really have any idea what to expect. But she rebounds and takes the bot down with a chop block, and his bulky casing means he's a little slow getting back up. Cassie seizes on this opening ruthlessly, smashing him with high speed running strikes. In time she goes for the cover... Augusta gets in the ring and stops the referee from counting! She says she neglected to mention - she's not really up on current conventions, so she'd like this match be to fought under the most widely used ruleset in the year she first got into wrestling: 1828. The ref powers through that one, deadpan, as Augusta explains that Cassie never shook RADBOT's hand, and it's considered the height of unsporting conduct to attempt a pin over an opponent without having shaken their hand. Cassie gets in her face and Augusta quickly ducks back to the apron with her arms raised in peace; she says she's sorry but that's just how the sport was fought in her day, and Cassie did say she'd let the opposition pick the rules. Cassie groans and grabs the still-supine RADBOT's limp hand, which she gives a mocking, over-exaggerated shake - and RADBOT pulls her into an inside cradle! Cassie powers out on two, but as she comes back on the attack RADBOT hits her with a swinging powerslam and then an elbow drop! Augusta applauds delightedly as her creation takes control once more. RADBOT works over Cassie for a good while, but she eventually manages to land a Code: Vain combo to drop him to a knee. She hits the ropes and comes in for a shining wizard, but RADBOT reboots and pops her up - Cassie with a huracanrana counter, and she gets the three count!

But Augusta interjects again before the ref can call for the bell, asking where the rest of the count was in apparently genuine confusion. The official asks what she means, and she says pins are traditionally to the count of six. The referee tells her they're not, and says well that's what she's used to. The ref sighs, while Cassie gets right up in Augusta's face to argue this. That leads to RADBOT catching her with a lungblower! He follows up with a lifting DDT and covers. The ref counts three and Augusta starts to celebrate, but he moves on to four and she grimaces... five, and Cassie kicks out. She scrabbles to lock in the Throne Breaker, but RADBOT manages to fight her off and slide to the outside. Cassie doesn't let up, connecting with a sliding dropkick through the ropes which bumps RADBOT into the railing. She gives chase and they brawl for a bit; Cassie gets the upper hand and rolls in, and instructs the ref to count RADBOT out. Augusta once again protests, asking what this newfangled "count out" thing is supposed to be. Cassie rounds on Augusta and seems about ready to sock her, but before she can swing a punch RADBOT reaches through the ropes and trips her! Cassie snaps and flings herself under the ropes to get him, but he catches her and wheels her right around 360 degrees and slams her back into the apron! He shoves her back in and once again works her over - but Cassie's full of adrenaline now and she manages to find a series of judo throws to drop him, and she finally locks in the Throne Breaker properly. Augusta hops onto the apron yet again, but this time Cassie's ready and she pounces over, knocking the scientist off and into the railings, then quickly sets the dragon sleeper back in, and before Augusta can interfere yet again, RADBOT powers down!
Winner via submission: Cassie Crowe

Augusta scowls and retrieves her bot, muttering about having to make adjustments, clearly, while Cassie celebrates winning her GEW debut and the fact that makes her technically the only undefeated wrestler on the roster right now.

3. Lyra Keston & Revvy King vs Napoleon Collins III & Zeke Colton Spence
Pride on the line here after Lyra and Revvy patronisingly ribbed Zeke and Napoleon for falling to the Jokers Wild's shenanigans, only for them in turn to punked by the dirty tricks of both the Jokers and the Natural Ones! With something to prove, both sides come out swinging and this is a fast paced match with a lot of quick tags and double teams, as well as a ton of counters and reversals, as you'd expect from the fact they all trained together. Big moves and near falls on both sides, but as it goes on we get a reversal of the last couple of the shows - this time it's not Lyra but Revvy who's hogging the ring and refusing to tag out! Lyra's getting agitated as Revvy's valiant one-on-two offence inevitably falters. Honourable as they are, Zeke and NC3 aren't responsible if an opponent makes a tactical error, and Collins catches King (who's been legal for several straight minutes at this point) with an avalanche fisherman buster to pin her.
Winners via pinfall: Napoleon Collins III & Zeke Colton Spence

Lyra asks Revvy "what was that" as they're walking back up the ramp; Revvy just shrugs.

Following that match, we get a look at a couple of familiar faces in the audience, though now very different to when they last featured in GEW: Cid and Amanda, the children of Shelly Hollins and Wilde Tanke, now grown up into young adults! They're quietly discussing what they just saw, but they still stand out, Amanda with pink and silver peekaboo highlights in her voluminous dark hair, while Cid's wearing a jacket with a bold, hand-painted silver thunderbolt, a clear homage to his birth father Lightning. Stevie and Crell speculate on whether they're here simply to enjoy the show, or to scout out potential opponents as the next generation of YouthFul Image.

4. Cole McGrath vs Ivan Grant
Respectful handshake, but once the bell rings it's on, as the two stronk lads go into an immediate lockup and start forcefully grappling each other all over the ring. Being much taller and heavier, Ivan gains control, but Cole's able to switch into a rollup, and from there they exchange pins, and then go back and forth on the canvas looking for submissions. In this way, the style changes frequently as they try to find holes in one another's game. At around the eight minute mark, we get our first fall when Cole is able to roll Ivan down into a textbook mousetrap pin! Ivan - who requested this match in the first place - grimaces, but digs deep to stop the disappointment from affecting his strategy, and he equalises a few minutes later when he's able to trap Cole in a scorpion lock, the height difference adding elevation, forcing the relative veteran to tap out. Now in sudden death mode, the hossery intensifies as they yeet each other around the shop. Both get big near falls, but ultimately it's Ivan who emerges victorious with his big swinging crucifix slam! They show respect to one another again afterwards.
Winner via pinfall: Ivan Grant

Crell questions whether we'll see a repeat of this outcome in the main event, when Ivan's father takes on Cole's brother...

5. Anson Orlandelli, Kai O'Hara, Ligaya Fontaine, Phreak & Russ Lehman vs Isabella Thorn, Nikki Song, Phil Hunter, Shaun Irvine & Velvet Grey
Isabella and her aunt Velvet unsurprisingly mesh well together, and Nikki does her best to work alongside them. Shooter Load don't really pay much attention to their allies at all; they want the Natural Ones, knowing that a strong performance against one of GEW's top teams could be big for their standing in the division. To that end they try to stay in the ring as much as possible, and keep Anson and Russ in too. But the other side are doing a good job of mixing in an out, with Russ taking on traffic direction duty and Kai backing him up, keeping an eye out for any dirty deeds on Phil and Shaun's part. We get most combinations of wrestlers, teasing any number of potentially interesting singles matches. Momentum goes back and forth and it seems like anyone could take it, but it comes down to a miscommunication between Phreak and Ligaya which leads to Isabella catching the latter with a schoolgirl to take the three.
Winners via pinfall: Isabella Thorn, Nikki Song, Phil Hunter, Shaun Irvine & Velvet Grey

The ominous squeak of an unoiled wheel can be heard as the picture fades into a shot of the parking lot. That's right, a camera is filming the arena parking lot at night for some reason - which is lucky for us, as it picks up a solitary figure cutting through the darkness towards it, dragging behind it a little red wagon with a squeaky wheel.

"Warriors, come out to play... Warriors, come out to playyyyy..."

As the figure approaches it is revealed to be Scott Simmonds, his little red wagon filled with an array of children's toys.

"Warriors, come out to playyyyyyyyyy... Because that's what this is to you, isn't it Ryan, a big fucking game? A game that you have put yourself into without fully comprehending the enormity of the situation. A game that you have entered without fully understanding just how dangerous the other player is. See all I've heard this week is cries and pleas of mercy from people who do understand what you're getting yourself into, 'Please Scott go easy on him', 'Don't hurt him Scott, he's just a kid', 'We're sorry Scott, he doesn’t know any better'. The people who care about you, Ryan, they are scared about what I might do to you when we step into the ring. The people who care about you, they can comprehend the enormity of the situation because they have seen it before. They have seen me before. They have seen my brutality before. Three weeks ago when you cracked me in the head and cost me my shot at the Chaos Championship tournament final you got a taste, but tonight you will get to bathe in my brutality. Which brings me to this little box of tricks behind me - see, I know you cut yourself up pretty bad when you got me with that light tube, shit, I think you might have even done more damage to yourself than you did to me. So in the interest of health and safety, before you can be trusted to start swinging weapons around, you need to learn to fight with your training wheels on."

Scott pulls the little red wagon into clear view of the camera; amongst other kids' toys it has a plastic weed whacker, colourful plastic chairs and some Mega Bloks.

"I'm not going to go easy on you, Ryan. In fact I will relish the chance to finally get my hands on you after how much of a pain in my ass you have been. But before I do I will make sure that you get a chance to fight in surroundings that are a little bit more up to your speed, in the first ever Fisher-Price My First Deathmatch. But be warned, some of these things... they are a choking hazard to small children."

6. Ryan McGrath vs Scott Simmonds
Undeterred by his impending murder, Ryan still talks a little trash to the 'old man', doing his best to pretend the threats he just saw didn't rattle him, and tries to engage Scott in a lock-up. Despite not being huge himself, Scott still has a considerable size advantage and powers Ryan down from the collar and elbow, sending him rolling back into a corner. Ryan sits looking up at him for a split second before rushing back to his feet and charging into another lock-up; this time Scott powers him back into the corner where he holds him up in the ropes. Ryan tries to get the ref to call a rope break and is promptly reminded this is a deathmatch, as Scott begins scrubbing his forearm across the youngster's face before grabbing him under the arms and tossing him halfways across the ring. Again, Ryan comes back up to his feet quickly and tries to rush at Scott, and again shows his inexperience in trying to go hold for hold with the wily veteran. He soon finds himself thrown over the ropes and out to the floor... and this is where the fun begins.

Scott consults his little red wagon full of goodies, removing a wiffleball bat covered in lightbulbs (talk about a bright idea) and carefully placing it to one side, opting instead for a plastic bowling ball and skittle set which he promptly fires at Ryan - as, somewhere in the distance, Brian Damage winces. It's not even Tuesday night! Next out is the plastic weed whacker which Scott turns on and tries to hit Ryan with, but the youngster is too quick and he rolls underneath the blow, rising to hit Scott with a dropkick that sends him cannoning into the ring post. Ryan takes this opportunity to hit Scott with a few stiff strikes to the back before finally dropping the Georgian wild man to the floor completely with a shot to the back of the head courtesy of a red and yellow plastic chair. In an effort to assert his dominance, Ryan rolls Scott back in the ring for a pin, but doesn't even get a one count. Ryan has a go at the wagon, pulling out a plastic bag filled with army men which he scatters around the canvas before dropping Scott onto them with a headscissors takedown for a count of one and a half. Unfortunately for Ryan, not only does Scott kick out of this, but the former GEW World Champion also busts himself open on the platoon sergeant and the familiar feeling of colour on his face kicks him into another gear. Back on the outside of the ring he suplexes Ryan through two plastic tables stacked on top of one another, then teases the introduction of the lightbulb covered bat, but in his best efforts to preserve the sanctity of the Fisher-Price My First Deathmatch he instead goes for the Mega Bloks.

The middle part of the match gets a little more scrappy as Ryan struggles to avoid getting his face mutilated with toys, but he can do little to mount meaningful offense of his own, with each move he executes seeming to just further piss off the now crusty, blood-faced Simmonds. Worse than this, in the unfamiliar environment of the deathmatch Ryan tries a sitout jawbreaker but just ends up putting himself ass-first into a bunch of pointy shit. Eventually the match descends into chaos when Ryan stops being a boy and starts being a man. He first attacks Scott with a chair from ringside, before he disappears under the ring and returns with a light tube log cabin, which draws cheers from the crowd. He's careful to handle it with care so as not to hurt himself, and it's this hesitation that allows Scott to launch a counter-offensive. He catches Ryan from behind in a sleeper which he transitions into a Saito suplex onto the last few remaining army men, all before going back to the wagon and retrieving a bag filled with bamboo skewers which he proceeds to stab into the top of Ryan's head! Ryan actually lets out an audible squeal at this point, as his precious head-blood starts to run down into his eyes and for the first time it seems like maybe he realises what he's gotten himself into. He tries to get the skewers out of his head, but this only serves as a distraction for Scott to turn him inside out with a big lariat (though Scott may argue this was a mercy as the skewers fly out of Ryan's head as he flips through the air). The light tube log cabin finds its way into the ring at this point and, as if it wasn't pointy enough, gets placed over the last remnants of the army men and Mega Bloks. At this point Ryan decides to just nope the fuck out of there, but Scott's quick enough to catch him by the back of the waistband as he tries to climb through the ropes. Ryan teeters on the middle rope, like a bloody 150lb seesaw, but can do little to stop Scott from dragging him back into the ring - except for grab the lightbulb-covered wiffleball bat leaning against the ring, and crack Scott over the head with it!

Scott staggers, fresh blood now covering his face, and Ryan hits him again and again, in the face, arms and torso, until all of the bulbs are shattered. Ryan tosses the bat away and grabs his groggy opponent for a standing sitout shiranui right through the glass log cabin! Again Ryan lets out some uncomfortable sounds, but adrenaline takes over as he falls into a very loose cover, trying not to move in the pointy glass mess. Sadly for him, somehow Scott manages to kick out at two! Ryan looks pleadingly to the referee, who insists it was only a two count - or maybe he was looking for help to get out of the big glass minefield without hurting himself. Either way the ref just hangs back and lets things continue unhindered. Ryan gingerly manages to get up, as does Scott who slowly pulls himself back to his feet using the ropes, trying to shake out some of the glass from his bloody dreadlocks before stopping Ryan in his tracks with a big, crimson smirk, as if to say "is that all you've got?". Ryan rushes at him with a crossbody which sends both men up and over the ropes to the floor! They begin to brawl their way around ringside, introducing each other to whatever they can find. Crell and Stevie are forced to run for cover when Scott throws Ryan at them in retaliation for some remarks he heard them make, but quick as a flash Ryan leaps back off their table and moonsaults Scott to the floor!

The biggest problem Ryan seems to have at this point is that he can't pin Scott because he doesn't want to get back into that ring with all the debris of doom. His hesitation lets Scott back into the match, at which point the wily veteran hits Ryan with a hard kidney punch before sliding him back into the ring. He then begins to rip and gouge at Ryan's shirt, tearing it off and signalling that things are going to get a whole lot worse before they get better for the deathmatch rookie. Battered and bloody, Scott signals for the end, dragging Ryan over to the pointiest part of the canvas he can find and lifting him up in the double underhook. He drops him with the Lights Out Driver before making a point of rolling his lifeless and now partially uncovered body over into the glass, finally covering for the three count.
Winner via pinfall: Scott Simmonds

Scott's shedding blood and glass everywhere, but he manages to exit the auditorium under his own power. Ryan, on the other hand, has to be helped by a couple of medics. As he goes, Crell and Stevie discuss whether they think the lesson the kid learned tonight will stick.

7. Matt Kail vs Shane Tallin
After Kail makes his way to the ring, it's obvious by the look on his face he still has no idea how to deal with this situation. As Tallin makes his slow entrance, Matt begins to even look nervous, eyes never leaving his cloaked mentor. They stare each other down before the bell, neither moving. It lasts a long while, heavy tension between the two. Matt acts first, flying across the ring and crashing into Shane with a barrage of forearm strikes. He gets his larger opponent doubled over, before getting flung back suddenly, and Shane explodes forward with a pump kick. This sets the tone for the next few minutes and Shane takes his time slowly smashing Matt around the ring. Any time Matt comes close to standing, he's met with a violent foot to the skull. Matt eventually rallies, catching Shane with a huracanrana as he is running toward him to send him out of the ring. Matt chases him by climbing the turnbuckle and diving out with a crossbody, sending both men down on the ground. Matt scrambles up first and flips the ring apron up to delve below the ring. He shuffles some things, and emerges with a steel chair. He stands, turns, amd is met by a single handed chop to the throat! Shane grabs the discarded chair and introduces it to Matt's back a few times.

From this point forward it devolves into a violent affair, brawling around the ring as each man pulls weapon after weapon. Kail doesn't make Shane's time easy, and though Tallin maintains advantage for much of the proceedings, it's Kail who strikes the first intense blow. Tallin runs in for a knee strike against the ring steps, but Kail moves, and Tallin's surgically repaired right knee smashes into the steel. Matt takes advantage and slams Shane face-first into the steps as well, with a second for good measure. Tallin slumps, sitting against the steps. Matt then grabs a chair, runs full tilt at Shane, and sandwiches his skull with a chair-assisted dropkick. He dives into a pin outside the ring, but gets forcefully pushed off at two. Matt tries to push the advantage, but though there is pain on Tallin's face after every blow, he begins eating shots. After walking through a superkick, Tallin gets hold of Matt and grabs him by the throat, heaving him overhead with a double handed choketoss. From here, Matt begins to eat heavy damage, getting tossed around with ease, though refusing to be pinned. He's powerbombed into a pile of chairs, suplexed into the guardrail, and sent through two tables in the course of a few minutes. Yet he kicks out again and again. Tallin takes him back into the ring - where a barbed wire board is set in the corner. He drags Matt, mostly unmoving, and places him against the board. He then goes to the opposite post before charging full speed. As he looks to smash Kail through the board and wire, Matt pulls away! Shane is wrapped up in the wire, and Matt comes charging in with a dropkick that plants Tallin even further into the barbs. Matt rips Shane and the board down, burying Tallin on the ground. He then acts quickly, collecting a pile of glass, some shards of broken wood, amd a fresh table. He sets the table over the glass and wood, and sets it ablaze. At this point, Shane is almost standing, but Matt gets on him quick, stomping at him buried in the wood and wire. He gets Shane onto the the table, the burning wood and glass stacked below it, and flies off the top rope! Beautiful senton bomb through Tallin, sending them crashing into a burning wreck. Matt hauls Tallin out, pins... one... two... thr- TALLIN'S SHOULDER FLIES UP! Matt tries to get to his feet quickly, but a hand meets his throat again, and Tallin hauls the struggling Matt up with him. He then lays in a series of big forearms, before hitting a uranage into the now extinguished pile of wood and glass in the center of the ring. Tallin stalks Matt after this, watching him try and pull himself up, before shutting him down with a Second Shattering. One, two, three.
Winner via pinfall: Shane Tallin

The crowd boos Shane tremendously, but he ignores them entirely, only seeming to say something to Matt before standing. He glances out at the crowd, and the lights go out. When they come back, it's just Matt in the ring. He takes some time to pull himself up, and as he does, the crowd begins cheering and clapping for the performance. He nods, but doesn't smile. He climbs out of the ring, and calls a ring aid to help him quietly walk out, eyes locked on the ground the whole while.

Once again, there's a short break as the ring crew clean up after the last couple of matches, before the triple main event tournament finals. While they're doing that the venue darkens a bit and the video screen flares into life, as Vanilla Fudge's interpretation of Season Of The Witch begins to play. It begins on a lonely desert at night, though a faint glow on the horizon suggests a city. Cut to a cross grave marker, tall but made of thin planks, swaying in the hot wind, the moon behind it. From that to a close detail of something round, something cold chrome. As the camera pans around it, it fades to a pair of suit trousers, slowly panning up them. The chrome object rotates to reveal the teeth and nose-hole of a skull. Further up the suited figure, over a blood red tie and white crucifix lapel pin, which stand out against the plain black fabric of the person's jacket and shirt. Past the chrome skull's eye sockets to a black crown of thorns around its brow. The skull is revealed to be a mask at the mysterious figure's head, before we fade to them from afar walking through the moonlit desert. Finally, a close-up of the skull mask being removed to reveal rugged looks. A neatly trimmed beard. Piercing blue eyes which seem to be focused somewhere behind the viewer. The fans erupt as they realise who this is! The name of the penultimate GEW World Champion flashes up:


The Preacher turns away from the camera and fades into darkness as he walks away, the view dissolving back to that nighttime desertscape, before fading entirely as the lights return with the fans still cheering. They don't get much chance to catch their breath, though, as Carly Mitchell announces that the following match is a two-out-of-three falls tornado tag team match to crown the inaugural GEW Global Tag Team Champions!

8. GEW Global Tag Team Championship tournament final: The Jokers Wild (BlakJak & Spades) vs MC Inc (Casey Black & Lance Murphy)
The Jokers Wild enter first, wearing hoodies and masks, stylized versions of their face paint. When MC Inc enter Casey's visibly tense about facing a couple of clowns, especially in a two out of three falls match where he can't tag out, but Lance and Tony Harrison are trying to do their best to reasure him as they head to the ring. The Jokers remove their masks to reveal paintless faces, as they've been doing for years since GEW ended. They explain that they respect MC Inc, and think it'd be cheap to have that handicap in the championship match. They drop the mics before MC Inc and their manager can get to the ring though, and charge with a tandem suicide dive! Tony gets involved as the brawl breaks out, clobbering Spades and Jak whenever they come near, only for them to drop him with a double suplex before resuming the fight with MC Inc. When the ref finally manages to force the four actual scheduled competitors back into the ring, the bell sounds, and they're throwing fists into each other from the outset. Neither team backing down, taking shot after shot. It takes a while for this stalemate to break, but it comes when Lance nails Spades with a clothesline and topples him from ring before Jak can stop him. Spades hops onto the apron to come back, but is blocked by Casey who hits a running boot to send Spades crashing onto the barricade. This gives MC Inc time to focus on Jak, and they begin laying into him with a series of tandem maneuvers. They look to set up for the Tag Team Bagger, but Spades suddenly pops up in front of Lance and quickly jabs him in the eye, which causes Casey to completely whiff and end up ass-first on the canvas. Spades' opening shot opens the floodgates though, and the two teams begin incessantly trying to cheat, and the action spills all around the ring. Jak and Spades throw Lance over the rails and try to convince a bunch of fans that they'll pay them to bury the bigger dude in chairs. Casey hits a running knee on Jak against the barricade, and then immediately lets a fart rip in his face - while not illegal, the ref throws his hands up and asks him "what the hell, man?".

Eventually, all four men end up back in the ring, scrambling to make or break pins one after another frantically. During the chaos, Lance tosses Spades between the ropes again and quickly breaks up a pin attempt on Casey. He hauls BlakJak up, only to reintroduce him to the ground with a stiff clothesline. He stays on him, hits The Ultimate Zing clean, and scores the first pin as Casey runs the block on Spades! The match only quickens from here on out, double teams coming from every direction. Both teams ramp up the nonsense as well. After being both downed again, the Jokers roll from the ring. When they do, Lance urges Casey to keep up the attack, saying that Casey is doing great. Casey, clearly still a little uncomfortable with the Jokers Wild, hesitantly begins to make toward the ropes with Lance - when the Jokers appear on the apron, masks back on! Casey freezes and both Jokers take flight, catching the Cunts with a pair of stereo springboard dropkicks. They press the advantage to dispose of Lance, and quickly hit a Murder-Go-Round on the paralysed Casey for the second fall. From this point forward, the Jokers' focus on Casey is evident, and they begin working him over with tandem offense, quickly knocking Lance from the ring whenever he tries to intervene. They look to hit Cotton Candy & Popsicles, but Lance manages to make the save! He pulls Jak away and tosses him from the ring. Spades evades the situation and manages to get to the other side of the ring. Lance leaves him be to check on Casey, then tells his partner that the only way through this is to face his fear! He points at the still masked Spades across the ring, and tells Casey that he can do it! At which point Casey seems to take it to heart, and for the first time since the masks were reintroduced, he moves toward Spades... however his eyes are closed. And he's kinda trembling. Spades approaches as Casey takes a lockup stance, rips off his mask, smiles, waves to Lance, and simply hoofs Casey right in the dick. As Casey crumples, Lance charges Spades, but the Joker evades him again and rolls from the ring to regroup with his partner. Once the Jokers re-enter the ring, their masks are gone again. The two take advantage of Casey being down, and seem to hold control for a while longer. They have less success keeping Lance out of the equation this time, and have to contend with him to get to their intended target. Just as the Jokers look to hit a Murder-Go-Round on Lance though, Tony hooks Spades good from outside! He eats it and Jak is forced to adjust course, hitting a rotating For The Maggots instead! He holds on for the pin, but Casey cracks him with a Shining Wizard! He tosses Spades after a series of stiff forearms, and then (eyes actually closed again) hefts Jak up - Fade to Black! He yells triumphantly as he makes the pin. One... two... THREE!
Winners via pinfall and new GEW Global Tag Team Champions: MC Inc

The ref calls for the bell, and Jak rolls from the ring as MC Inc celebrate. Casey seems absolutely shocked, and begins to laugh like an idiot as the belt is handed to him and they are declared the first GEW Global Tag Team Champions! Outside the Jokers reconvene, absolutely spent, and clap a little. Casey and Lance hold their new titles above their heads, but stop as the Jokers roll in. They don't attack though, simply giving the Cunts a nod of respect, and they offer out a fist bump. MC Inc indulge them, and then are left to continue their celebration alongside Tony.

9. GEW Phoenix Championship tournament final: Evangelista vs Serena Raine
Evangelista comes in looking nervous but determined to do her best. Serena, on the other hand, couldn't be more confident. She's got the G/P Most Adept Championship over one shoulder and pats the blank space on the other side, mouthing to the camera that she's about to be a double champion. Nevertheless, the two old friends shake hands after the bell, before going into a careful lock up. They jockey back and forth, moving around the ring and looking for leverage; whenever one woman is able to start feeling out a submission hold, the other has the escape. The change comes when Serena shoots her smaller opponent into the ropes, and catches her with a Samoan drop on the way back. That opens the door on mixing in high speed sequences with rebounds and springboards, though still always trying to turn the pace advantage into a hold, be it an armdrag into an armbar, a satellite spin into an octopus stretch, or a sliding sunset flip twisted into a Boston crab. It seems like Serena has it when she flips Evangelista out of midair into a cross ambreaker, but after a lot of struggle the Lilac Thorn manages to get a boot on the rope. She's clutching her shoulder and wincing after they break, and Serena has a target now, working it over at every opportunity. Evangelista digs deep and refuses to tap to anything Raine locks her into; the strategy still pays off for Serena though, when Evangelista struggles on a Headbreaker attempt allowing Serena to escape and hit an inverted Russian legsweep. The anaconda choke follows, but with a mighty scream Evangelista's able to reverse into the Lime Street Loop and this time it's Raine who only just gets a foot on the bottom rope! As Serena crawls away after that, Leanne takes the opportunity to shake her arm and massage it out. Moving forward she takes care to favour it and get strength back, while by contrast Serena's starting to get frustrated at how long this is taking. Finally, after evading or escaping all of each other's biggest moves, Evangelista manages to catch Serena with the Headbreaker out of nowhere and lock in the Lime Street Loop again! Serena almost hooks the bottom rope but Evangelista drags her back to the middle of the ring in time, and half a minute later, Serena taps!
Winner via submission and new GEW Phoenix Champion: Evangelista

While the referee fetches the belt, Evangelista helps Raine stand and offers her another handshake. Serena pushes her away and just drops out of the ring angrily, to a chorus of boos, leaving Leanne to just frown and watch as her friend stomps away. But she quickly turns her attention back to the fans who cheer for her as the referee presents her with the Phoenix Championship and raises her arm! Evangelista looks to be on the verge of tears as she gratefully thanks the fans for their support.

And so, our second supershow closes with the same pairing which opened our first. Once again, the two Hall of Famers both get deafening receptions as they make their entrances, and they come face to face in the middle of the ring, both glancing up at the title belt dangling above them while the referee reminds us that this is a doomsday ladder match: before either man can retrieve the championship, he must pin his opponent. Thor and Kam nod at each other briefly in mutual respect, and then the bell rings...

10. GEW Chaos Championship tournament final: Kameron Chase vs Sah'ta Thor
...they immediately start slamming each other with elbows and closed fists! It soon turns into a big exchange of throws, and within a minute it spills to ringside when Thor takes both Kam and himself over with a running clothesline. He retrieves his signature barbed wire bat and swings it into Kameron's shoulders from behind, then wheels him into the ringpost, but when he charges in for a strike Kam gets his feet up and Thor smacks headlong into them. They fight up and down and all over the place, taking full advantage of the lack of countouts or disqualifications as they throw each other into the guard rails and the ladders which have been set up, slam each other onto the bare floor, and brawl into the stands. By the time they finally get back to the ring minutes later, Kam has a busted lip and and a mashed up back, and Thor is bleeding from a cut in his eyebrow. Thor throws Kameron into the ring steps and then grabs a ladder, but as he's sliding it into the ring Kam comes back with a rising kick to the steel to bounce it up into Thor's face! Kam throws Thor under the bottom rope then vaults to the top... springs into the Three Mile Island combo as Thor rises, and pins. Thor kicks out just in time, though. Kam follows straight up with a wheelbarrow suplex and another pin, but another kickout. After a couple of minutes of variously slamming each other into the ladder or slamming the ladder into each other, it's Thor's turn to pin when he spins Kam right around with a roundhouse, straight into an Olympic slam onto the side of the ladder which lies across the middle rope in the corner! But Kam, showing the toughness that made him a four time Extreme Chaos Champion, rolls a shoulder right on the three.

But Thor has unique motivation here. The precursor to the Chaos Championship was the one accolade he never achieved in the original GEW, yet the one he coveted most. There would be no finer way to make up for that burning disappointment than by inaugurating its successor in the new era. He stays on the offence, pushing through the pain, using the ladder and his bat to his advantage until Chase is busted open fully and crimson masked. Yet still the Natural Disaster won't stay down to anything, and he manages to rotate through on a Parasite Eve attempt, sending Thor into the ropes and snapping him back with a release dragon suplex into the ladder. As Thor staggers to one knee, the back of his head is clearly gushing. Smelling blood (possibly literally), Chase drags Thor up for the Force 10... Thor with a twisting escape, high knee, they both fall back into opposite ropes and then spring back! Kam with a lariat but Thor ducks and on the way back has a flying forearm! He pulls Kameron over his shoulders... SERAPHIM'S SHADOW INTO THE LADDER! Just to be extra sure he places his barbed wire bat across Kam's collarbone as he pins, and gets the three count! Normally, he'd be Chaos Champion right now - but this isn't a normal match. He still has to claim the belt itself, hanging high above him. He kicks Kameron out under the ropes, and then sets about getting that ladder in place. He's lost a lot of blood and is still leaking as he hauls himself up rung by rung, but his determined eyes are locked on the prize above him... until Kameron slithers back into the ring and flings his entire body into the ladder, sending it toppling over and Thor crashing to ringside! He glances up at the title, but he can't go for it yet. So he mounts the corner and leaps off in a crossbody that wipes Thor out just as he was starting to get back up. A moment later there's a German on the apron, and then Kam rolls Thor in and covers... but the leader of the Empire of Blood gets a shoulder up! Chase can't believe it, but he grabs Thor's own bat and starts digging the barbs into his forehead. The pain helps wake Thor up though and he retaliates by biting Kam's forehead!

They're soon smashing one another with straight punches to the face. Thor starts to get the better of it - until Kam suddenly blocks one and snaps him off his feet with a Force 10. He rolls over and pins, but again Thor gets a shoulder up. Kam slaps the mat in frustration before sliding out and getting a second ladder. He takes a moment to put Thor down again before building a bridge with one ladder lying between the other and the ropes, and he lifts his opponent up... vertical suplex... kidneys first into the steel! Thor's left spreadeagled on the ladder as Kameron climbs the other. He leaps off for a diving fist drop - Thor flops off the steel and Kam crashes into it at full force! With gritted teeth, Thor walks the ladder upright and squeezes Kameron against the ropes, then grabs his bat and unwinds a length of barbed wire from it, lashing it around Kam, the cables and the ladder! With Chase tangled up, Thor drags the other ladder back into place and begins to climb once more while Kameron tries to figure out how to free himself. Thor is within inches of becoming the inaugural Chaos Champion, but Kameron finally gets free and claws himself up the ladder, where he connects a shot into Thor's belly! Thor retalitates with a forearm to the back of Kam's neck, but the Natural Disaster sucks it up and draws level... rocks Thor with a headbutt, then bounces his skull off the top of the ladder... drags him over his shoulders... MENTAL MAELSTROM OFF THE LADDER! Kam plants Thor into the canvas from ten feet up! He stays in place for the pin; One! Two! Three! The fans erupt as they realise that now whichever man can climb the ladder and grab the title belt will win!

Both men are slow to their feet after a spill like that, though. Kam's the first there, but his knees are clearly killing him after that last move, and even though he kicks Thor out of the ring, the latter's rolling back under ropes before Chase is at the top of the ladder. Kam sighs and drops down to go on the offensive. The two men slowly begin slugging each other once more, opening up cuts again and causing fresh blood to drip all over the canvas. For several minutes, neither seems able to put the other down long enough to climb safely, even though they all but snap that second ladder in half by driving one another into it, and leave the barbed wire that started out on Thor's bat detangled and strewn around the ring. Finally, they're both at the top of the ladder, clinging on for dear life as they slam heavy fists into each other's skulls. Thor pulls Kam over his shoulders, perhaps looking for another Seraphim's Shadow or Parasite Eve, and the ladder's feet wobble precariously, but Kam manages to smack enough elbows into Thor's skull to retake his feet - and drag Thor over his shoulders instead! A second Mental Maelstrom off the ladder might just end the match via literal murder, but Thor too is able to block it with wild strikes... and then, as he's sliding off Kam's shoulders, he bites him in the forehead! Fresh blood washes into Kameron's eyes, allowing Thor to shove him off the ladder! As Chase falls all the way to the floor Thor quickly stretches up and unhooks the belt!
Winner via belt retrieval and new GEW Chaos Champion: Sah'ta Thor

The fans cheer as Thor slowly descends again, clutching the Chaos Championship to his chest, and sits down on the bottom rung. He closes his eyes as presses the faceplate to his forehead; his blood stains the metal and leather, a fitting baptism for a deathmatch title. His entire GEW career, the number one title he coveted was the Extreme Chaos Championship, and it was the only one he never managed to win. But now he's etched his name at the very top of its successor. He's unsteady on his feet as he tries to stand up, but his children, Isabella Thorn and Ivan Grant, have already come out to celebrate with him and they steady him across their shoulders, not noticing or caring that they're getting covered in his blood too. Kameron steps forward... they lock eyes... slowly, Kam extends a hand and they shake. As Kameron fastens the belt around Thor's waist he leans in close and warns him that holding it is the hard part, but then drops down and rolls out, clearly frustrated at not inaugurating this title like he did the Extreme Chaos, but knowing he'll have more opportunities down the line. For now he's willing to leave our new champion to celebrate with his daughter and son, as the fans give him an ovation.